【Stocking Girl’s Wet Pink Petals】

Celebrity baby names have Stocking Girl’s Wet Pink Petalsbecome a total snooze.

Where have all the Audio Sciences gone? Blake Lively couldn't even throw us a bone by naming her kid after Taylor Swift. Instead, she and Ryan Reynolds went with the lovely and admittedly unexpected name Inez. The last truly great branding of a celebrity offspring was clearly Saint West.

But, as we prepare to welcome Beyoncé's twins to the world, Amber Tamblyn and David Cross have given us hope in the time we need it most. Tamblyn gave birth to the couple's first child, a daughter, and announced on Instagram with a cute video that her name is Dauphinoise Petunia Brittany Scheherazade Von Funkinstein Mustard Witch RBG Cross Tamblyn-Bey Jr.

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Of course, she's trolling us here, but that's fine. We'll take the feminist bait happily and hope that she at least considers a Ruth Bader Ginsburg costume when baby's first Halloween rolls around.

Congratulations to the happy couple and please consider naming your kid America Blake Alexis Cross Tamblyn as a nod to Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsand the incomparable magic of female friendship.

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